Minor "Celebrity" Sighting!

I was warned last night by my very wonderful boyfriend that a blogger was recently sued by a "Super Model" for slamming her online so please note that I will be changing the names of this "celebrity" in order to protect my ass! Last night a group of my most fabulous friends met up at Lucky Strike for a little bowling and a lot of booze when low and behold we spotted the infamous "Shnooke Rogan" (use your imagination people)!

First of all, let it be known in the open that I am very severe on my sex when it comes to style, hygiene, maintenance, etc. That being said, what a vision of Browardliness that Shnooke is!! Her platinum-straw hair was in abundance and her boobs really could've used a little more support. Also, I made an amazing discovery last night that I had never gotten a clear answer on just by watching the show--she has absolutely no ass! This is a major travesty as the poor girl already has man shoulders and no curves and could've really benefited from a pair of hips!

Her entourage was phenomenal! I've named them all as I have no idea who they are (a bunch of nobodies I guess) so please enjoy! There's Chucko, the red-headed "DJ" who was sporting an amazing set of ginger dreads under his baseball cap. Then there was No Game who was sporting a beautiful t-shirt that read "I love Oral" which I'm sure brings him tons of butter-faces. Then there was her love interest who I've named Timmy due to the extremely large cranium he was carrying around! I cannot say enough for Timmy (South Park reference) and his suave moves as he strutted around in his baggy jorts with the baseball cap he probably had custom made at Lids in Dolphin Mall (it was sitting on top of his head like a sauce pan)! The boy absolutely wreaked of failed reggaeton star and was a full head (very huge head that is) smaller than his lover!

Shnooke couldn't get enough of Timmy and yes, I have photo evidence of them making out (stay tuned for pictures)! What a classy bunch of Central Florida Escapees!! This sort of spectacle is something I would've expected from Seminole Hard Rock but not in South Beach! I also have to comment on the extreme manliness with which Shnooke handles the bowling ball and how she is constantly practicing dance moves while waiting for her ball to run back up the conveyor. Nice.

It's little unexpected treats like this that I am committed to provide to my dear friends and readers on a daily basis. I love tacky people...they make me feel so fantastic!